We all do it and we love doing it. ‘Small Talk’ is a part of our lives. However, many a times we wait for ‘that comfort level’ to set in. As a traveler, I come across strangers everyday. Strangers who are from different cities or countries, speak different languages, look different, and eat varied kinds of food.

After so many years of travelling, I still have the same fears when it comes to striking a conversation with strangers I meet on the way. My fears range from the most common to the most weird.

Can you relate to any of these fears?

An interesting thing I noticed is that all these inhibitions start with a ‘What if’. I started noticing people who could strike a conversation with absolute ease in any situation and with any one. I saw that most of these fears had nothing to do with the people I was meeting. These fears were a residue of some past experience I had. Not getting that appreciation in school, being misunderstood by the very person I trusted the most,  or being laughed upon by school children when I wanted to be friends with a girl.

I started wondering how do these fears stop me as a Travel Writer. I may have missed the best story of my life because I did not strike a conversation with the lady sitting in front of me while I was travelling in a train from Zurich to Interlaken. I may have missed a hearty laugh when I did not speak to a group of students travelling in a train in India and laughing away to glory.

Last year, while I was on a solo trip to Thailand, I deliberately made an effort to speak to strangers. In all the heaviness about the outcome, I spoke. I was surprised by the responses I got. There was not a single person who ignored me or made fun of me. I had one of the most amazing conversation on Travel Photography with a guy travelling in a bus from Bangkok to Chumphon. While motorbiking from Chiang Mai to Pai, I got lost and walked up to a house to take help. I was welcomed with open arms and the family stood by me till someone came to pick me up.

If I am willing to go beyond my fears and let people come into my life with open arms, I saw I met absolutely wonderful people. It just started with a smile, or a ‘Hello’. Once I complimented a lady on the way she kept her hair together and we ended up having one of the best conversations. One of my friend met her life partner while diving in Andaman Islands, India. I see that most people talk only about small talk and its importance. However, I believe it is important to see and confront ones fears upfront before doing small talk. Sometimes I wonder, if the person in front of me also wants to talk but has same fears as I do. How about if I give up mine and start the conversation.

Small talk could start in an elevator, on a beach, or while travelling in a flight. Couple of things to remember are that keep the conversation light and away from controversial topics like terrorism, financial downfall, sex, or race. Most people come up with the most innovative ways to start conversation and books have been written on this topic. However, as a traveler I believe that best way of them all is a smile, a hello and an open heart.

Gaurav Bhatnagar Travel Writer, Photographer, Public Speaker, Entrepreneur @ www.thefolktales.com